David Archives

December 12, 2007

David: Portrait of Bruce As a Boy

“Oh, I’m so angry, I could metamorphose into a giant green mindless man-monster who goes on a rampage of destruction from one end of the country to the other, using my rage-fueled legs to jump miles at a time from one population center to another, bashing and smashing all the way. The army would get involved, sure, but my fury is such that their bullets and rockets would be useless against me. I would tear their tanks like tissue paper and spread the debris all across the Mojave Desert.”

“Dude, that’s got to be the worst metaphor I’ve ever heard.”

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December 13, 2007

David: Done Cursing the Darkness

Bell magic was magic of the senses, of sound and light, pleasure and pain. It was for people who chose to hide from reality behind pretty illusions, to pretend control over chaos.

Book magic was magic of knowing. The past, the future, the distant, the innermost. It was for people who needed answers and were willing to pay.

I was done hiding. I had enough answers. It was time for candle magic, the magic of energy, and therefore the magic of matter, space and time. It was a dangerous path, but I stepped onto it boldly.

God help them.

Showtime.

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January 7, 2008

David: Self-Discovery

“Because you were in an accident and lost your long term memory.”

“I don’t remember being in an accident.”

“That’s because you were in an accident and lost your long term memory.”

“So, I accidentally got hit in the face? And that made me lose my memory?”

“No, you got hit in the face on purpose.”

“But you just said it was an accident.”

“Your getting hit in the face is not what made you lose your memory. That happened a while ago.”

“Then why does my face hurt now?”

“Because I’m your sister, and you keep hitting on me.”

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January 8, 2008

David: The Unpleasant Truth

It’d been fifteen years since I’d set foot on campus. Finally coming back to complete my doctorate filled me with excitement and dread. What if I couldn’t think like that anymore? What if my brain had calcified over those years in industry, rendering me incapable of learning anything new? What if my research project failed?

Warily, I set one foot in front of the other and entered the quad. Children were throwing Frisbees and lying in the sun, staving off skin cancer by sheer force of youth. I didn’t belong here.

Damn those fools at the Institute for being right.

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January 9, 2008

David: Small Victories

Sisyphus lost his grip and sighed helplessly as the boulder rolled back down the hill. With a theatrical groan, he hung his head and started ambling down after it.

The first millennium had been pretty bad. He’d almost gone mad with frustration and a sense of futility more than once. Then, suddenly, he made his peace with his eternal task.

Sure, he was doomed to pointless, unending physical labor. But his mind was still his own. He counted steps and set goals for himself. He had fantasies no one could steal.

And during those trips back downhill, he was free.

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January 15, 2008

David: ...Up With

Okay, let’s see, what shall I write today? Is that the topic? Hmm. Tricky. Maybe I could do something about…. Or perhaps…. What about…? Nah, those ideas all suck.

But I have to write something. I’ve gone far too many days without it. People will start to think I’ve given up on the game, when in truth I’ve been doing other stuff that kept me either away from the computer or too busy to spare the time.

You’re letting your thoughts run away again. Focus. Come on, inspiration!

Ah, screw it. I’ll just post the first 100 words I come

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January 17, 2008

David: No, Really, I Swear to God

I thought it would help. I thought it would be funny. I thought it might make people think. I thought she was cute. I thought I could reach it. I thought it was less fragile. I thought if one was good, two must be better. I thought it was unloaded. I thought I could handle it. I thought you were out of town. I thought she was your sister. I thought you were your sister. I thought your sister was you. I thought I had more time. I thought the rain would hold off. I thought you were feeding it.

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January 22, 2008

David: That's The Good News

So there I was, in some sort of infinite featureless expanse. Everywhere I looked I saw nothing but black. Pure, solid blackness, darker than the cloudiest moonless night.

I was hovering, or at least I was unsupported and yet not falling. I know you’re wondering how I could tell I wasn’t falling if there weren’t any landmarks to judge motion against. There wasn’t any wind. I wasn’t having trouble breathing, so I had to assume there was air, but air wasn’t rushing upward past me. Ergo, not falling. Floating.

But the sounds came from every quarter, and were positively unholy.

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January 23, 2008

David: Tense Negotiations

“One thousand dollars.”

“For that, I can care at about a six.”

“Aw, come on. All right. Twelve hundred.”

“For twelve hundred, I’ll only care five.”

“Okay. Final offer. This is every penny I have in the world. Twelve hundred and ninety four dollars, and… thirty eight cents. I’m begging you, man. Come down to three?”

“Three?! I don’t care three for less than fifteen hundred. I can go four, though. And that’s me being generous.”

“Please. She’s my world. I could maybe squeak by with you caring three point five.”

“Sorry, buddy. For that money, I couldn’t care less.”

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January 24, 2008

David: Oh, That

“I walk past this tree every day on my way to work. It reminds me of this magnolia we had in the yard when I was a kid. I’d spend hours up there every day, dreaming of sitting in the crow’s nest looking for pirates, or blasting off to the moon, or exploring the deepest Amazon jungle.

“Then I grew up and stopped climbing trees. I sit in a cube and move numbers. But today I decided that it was time for another adventure, that it’s never too late for the simple joys.”

“Yes, sir. But why are you naked?”

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