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August 20, 2007


A hero's not just a sandwich.

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David: Sloppy Work

Joe Stone, veteran of such adventures as the Radioactive Hitler Affair and Zeppelins Over Washington, made the fatal mistake of assuming word had gotten out to every lost tribe that cannibalism was out of vogue.

As Stone roasted over the fire, Haniki groused to his tribemate, “We are so many, and he was but one man. I fear I will go hungry eating only my share of him with bread.”

“Do as I do. Add him to a spiced tomato paste. He will be hearty and filling. For a hero is just a sandwich, but a manwich is a meal.”

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Dave: If This Be Dinner ...

"So you finally beat him." Doctor Dread put down his wine glass.  The table was set with finery from a hundred heists.

"Simple enough," said the White Widow.  "Omegaman thought I was still using those old Mark V Dreadbots you sold me a in '03.  He had no idea I'd upgraded.  When those terawatt lasers hit ..."

"Then you left his head on the doorstep of Team Justice's HQ.  Nice.  But what about the rest of his body?"

A small smile played on her face, "Oh, I'm dealing with that a bit at a time."  She paused over the carving board.  "White meat or dark?"

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Jeff R.: Well, At Least It's Not About Cannibalism

Everyone knew Captain Crusader was in a downward spiral, after his over-acting ways ruined three consecutive attempts to move into a career in film. So when he started hanging out with a two-dimensional Japanese demon who's 'reformation' from supervillany was as thin as his own body, nobody was surprised.

However, when the two of them were caught and photographed by the press while using the Justice Batallion's time machine to seduce history's greatest beauties, culminating in the daughter of King Herod, the headline that ended the Captain's Career Resulted.

(Wait For It...)

'Ham, Paper Oni, and Salome in 'Hero Sandwich''

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