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January 15, 2007


Robert Anton Wilson passed on last Thursday.

In Memoriam, the theme of today will be Illumination

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Jim: I Should Have Been A Shriner

“Can I have a light?” I asked the bartender.

“The ceiling’s full of them,” he replied sarcastically.

“I noticed. Still, can I have a light?”

“We only serve real beer, Pal. Lagers and ales. Which do you want?”

“I’m drinking Scotch. So…can I have a light?”

“Where’s your smoke?” he asked, reaching for some matches.

I leaned close. “Listen carefully,” I whispered urgently. “Can. I. Have. A. Light?”

“Oh," he loudly declared. "You must be looking for the secret Illuminati meeting. It’s the door in the back.”

Walking away, I mumbled, “I bet the Tri-Lateral Commission can afford real security."

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Stacy: Illuminated

They came to us in the Tyme of Twylyght. Fyrst they drewe Picktures, cunning images on parchemente. Twould suspende from Wyres, they sayed, each anchored to the summite of a hygh Mountain.

The King was enraptured as a chylde, and gifted them with Gold and Sylver. They Travelled to the West with many men and Horses. The Womeyn wept with fear.

The men clymbed the Mountains, tho some did dye. The Wyres were at last in place, and the Orbe lifted up on the backs of Giantes. A great Magick was formed and worked. And Lo! There Was The Sun.

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Jeff R.:Illuminated Manuscript

Frank ran towards me, holding some old dusty tome.
"I'm telling you, Joe", said Frank, "This book is gonna answer everything."
"Like what?" I repleid.
"Like, enlightenment an' the real meaning of life an' all that." said Frank.
"It is? What makes you think that?" I queried.
"It says so right here." answered Frank,
"I don't think that means what you think it does."
Frank was always a bit too literal for his own good. Last month he got a hold of an engineering book, then spent weeks handling it with tongs, after seeing that it had an exploded diagram.

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