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November 15, 2006

11.15.06

Her bathroom was the apex of human technology...

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Jim: Read The Directions Carefully

Pop stardom’s latest diva led her entourage through the mansion. “Finally!” she squealed. “I get to see where my money went!”

Dr. Bannock jogged in her wake. “It wasn’t easy,” he panted. “Frankly, some think the technology isn’t really ethical.”

“Nonsense,” the ingénue pouted.

“Hey!” Dr. Bannock grinned, rushing ahead. “I just do what you pay me to do.” He swung open the door and the starlet rushed inside.

She ran out screaming, splattered with feces and with a dozen chimpanzees screeching behind her.

That was when Dr. Bannock, cloning expert, discovered that she wanted the apex of human technology.

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Ted: Perfect Setting

Her bathroom was the apex of human technology.

The digital thermocouples gave instant temperature control on every faucet.

The shower was large enough for three people; the tub was more like a pool.

The oubliette, bidet, and floor were heated using vented heat from the incinerator underground.

The mirrors were works of art; automated cams and display screens allowed 360 degree vision.

Razors and other bath supplies were hidden in recesses that would not mar the tile mosaic designs.

All comms devices were blocked by a Faraday field, to ensure privacy.

Which made it the perfect place to murder her.

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