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June 12, 2005

Volume 2, Issue 12

Arrrrgh Mates!

Tell me a tale of

PIRACY.

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Ted: Man Overboard

Captain Incognito had sailed the Caribe far longer than any old salt had a right to. He'd plundered lost cities, sank hundreds of ships, and sacked towns from Trinidad to St. Augustine. He'd married young, but still danced with the daughter of every local governor, just to get information. He fought duels for honor, for treasure, to fight off mutineers, and for revenge. His family, once broken, was again whole. When he retired he was made an advisor to the King.

"Are you done with that stupid game now?"

"Coming!" he replied as he bid the good ship Meier farewell.

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Tanya: Piracy

Nearly thirty years had passed since he'd left the Spanish main. Twenty years he'd been a pirate in these waters, and before that, a decade of searching for a killer. But as his predecessor had predicted, he loved every minute of it. The brandy, the gold, the open sea. The swordfights. Mostly the swordfights.

He ordered his men to change their heading and hoist the Jolly Roger. They would check the rumor that the Duke was nearby, an easy target. Then the man once called Inigo climbed back up to the forecastle deck, smiling as he watched the mainland approach.

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Michele: Ode 64

Scott sends me to a flat in London.

What a bloody mess. Smashed rum bottles, cracker crumbs, a shelf with a slew of books. I pull one out at random; it’s splotched with blood and the cover informs that the magic word is "Yoho!"

Pirates. I should have known. Damn you, Scott.

Against my better judgment, I mutter "Yoho!" and woosh, I’m on a beach, in view of a pirate ship. I sigh. I know that somewhere between the stinking pirates and buried treasure there’s going to be a dark cave.

I’m likely to be eaten by a grue.

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