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From: Professor Emeritus Thwackwell-Sark »

January 8, 2007

1.8.07

The dog ate my homework, or the alarm didn't go off....you get the idea.

I need a very elaborate excuse...

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"I am rather sorry but I was late," I apologetically spoke. "I was doing some research."

"On what pray tell," came the brusque reply, "pubs & clubs of ole' London?"

"Not exactly," I replied a bit annyed at the sarcasm.

"So what sort of research are you doing late at night...if one may be so bold."

" I am too tired to be mocked."

"If you must know I was astral projecting," fearing the worst.

"I was astrally projecting myself into another realm of reality," I no longer cared, "in fact I'm rather good at it now."

He looked at me bemused.

Posted by: Andrew Ian Dodge at January 8, 2007 8:10 AM · Permalink

Title: A Little Delayed

Rupert yawned; scratching his chest then slumped down in his chair. The supervisor came over, looking him up and down. He smiled sleepily and raised a lazy hand to wave hello. “Sorry I’m late. Over slept, I guess. Had weird dreams…little people dancing around…” He shook his head, “I don’t know…Just weird.”

“Do you know how long you’ve been gone? And look at you! You have a four foot beard and smell!”

“Not that long, I’m sure. Wait, I don’t know you. Where’s William?”

“He’s long dead.”

“What year is this?” Rupert asked, looking at the company logo, CryoTech.

Posted by: Laieanna at January 8, 2007 10:47 AM · Permalink

Can't See the Forest fot the Bush:

“Good morning, thanks for calling ‘Excuses4you’. We’re sorry we can’t get the phone, but our guard dog wouldn’t let us in this morn… “

// Uh-Hello, hold on, *beeb* sorry about that. Thanks for calling.
My canary pecked the send button off my phone and, I, well… never mind.

Now, what excuse can I help you with?

Mmmhmm, yes, I see, boy, that’s a whopper.

Maybe you could say that you were thinking of Mass in the Catholic sense. Weapons of ‘Mass’ destruction.

Or, say you read it upside-down. WMD=MWD. That’s it! Mass Weapons Destruction. That’s what they were up to.”

Posted by: kasac at January 8, 2007 3:53 PM · Permalink

I had the right to remain silent…..

“Mr. Simmons, please” I sat up straight and put humility in my eyes, “I need this job!”

“Stawnyele,” his shoulders dropped in exasperation “you must stay off the internet!” Then, almost a sigh, not really a question “what do you do all day?”

“Oh Mr Simmons” I sputtered, knowing I should keep quite, “T.B. put up a really good theme today and well… Lars had such a good story. I just got so caught up.”

Mr. Simmons’ face began to harden, “Oh Simsie,” he hated that “you really should try it. Maybe we could write one together?”

“Mr., Simmons?”

*Bang*

Posted by: kasac at January 8, 2007 4:48 PM · Permalink

Typos make me quiet angry.

Posted by: kasac at January 8, 2007 5:11 PM · Permalink

kasac - what makes you loud angry?

Posted by: Jim Parkinson at January 8, 2007 7:13 PM · Permalink