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September 18, 2005

Volume 6, Issue 18

Who cares if the glass is helf-empty or half-full... what is in the glass?

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Comments

Pete was really enjoying this trip to Europe. The history! The grand architecture! The old-world cultures!

But he didn't much like the beer here. He'd thought Ireland supposedly had great beer and, yes, it looked very good, but they served it warmer than he liked and there was just something...wrong.

For one thing, it seemed awful thick. Almost like honey, but not sweet.

But then there was the other thing. Beer's supposed to make you pee, but this stuff didn't. It made him, uh, squat, and it was really unpleasant.

Then he heard it:

“Who's been drinkin' me motor oil!??”

Posted by: JamesF at September 18, 2005 9:09 AM · Permalink

Although barely distinguishable among the raucous clatter of the Bacchanalian revelers, the gentle tinkle of the summoning chime sounded to Laelia to be the ominous knelling of Jupiter’s grand temple bells.

She scurried to heed the summons.

“How about this fine young slave?” the drunken Emperor Claudius asked his fat, drooling guest. At his command, Laelia’s tunic flowed off her nubile form as water from glass.

Posing shamefully naked among the generals and senators, she noticed Claudius’ drinking bowl was half-full.

Half of the poison was already imbibed. So after tonight, one way or another, Laelia would finally be free.

Posted by: Jim Parkinson at September 18, 2005 12:46 PM · Permalink

The mash is cooked off in a copper kettle, the temperature just above the boiling point of alcohol (160 degrees F) and below the boiling point of water. The steam is captured and routed into the condenser, copper tubing coiled inside a barrel of cold spring water. No lead based solder or automobile radiator for a condenser here, nossiree Bubba, all we want coming out the end is almost pure corn liquor. This can be filtered through charred oak for color and flavor, and then - half a glass of squeezin's, half a glass of spring water, and you're in heaven ...

Posted by: hnumpah at September 18, 2005 2:03 PM · Permalink