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June 28, 2005

Volume 2, Issue 28

Random line, random book:

"You're lost, you've veered," said Melena, deciding not to be perplexed at his scrambled words. "No matter. Let me fix you a meal, and you can tell me your story."


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Stacy: Traveler

"Veered?" he shouted. "What the hell does that mean?"

He paced angrily, unable to comprehend how his calculations could have gone wrong, how he could have come so apparently far afield. He worked the equations for months, had access to the university mainframe, was so sure everything was correct. Yet, here he was…LOST.

Melena watched his rant silently. "Foolish mortal," she thought sadly, hands busy with the bread dough.

He finally sat down, looked at her with dull eyes. "You don't happen to have a Cray stashed somewhere in this dump, do you?"

Her laughter pealed through the still night.

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The storm washed away the roads that were guiding Charming and he was soon lost in an unfamiliar forest. Eventually, he came upon a cottage, where a woman wearing a blue gingham dress invited him for supper.

“I’m delivering a revival potion for the cursed queen,” he told her as he ate.
“A queen? There are no queens here. Wizards, witches, munchkins, but no queens.”
“No talking frogs and mice?”
“Mercy, no!”
“This is terrible. The king will have my head if I don’t return home.”
“Maybe I can help you,” the woman said. “What size shoe do you wear?”

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Tanya: Lost

"But who are you?" she asked again.

He nodded again, as she stirred the stew and wondered. This peculiar man had stumbled in out of the storm, in a suit far too dark and heavy for the season, and a bizarrely long woolen scarf. She straightened her hair, checking her reflection in a copper pot. He spoke in riddles, but he certainly was attractive.

"You haven’t seen a large blue box nearby, have you?" he asked, suddenly.

She lifted the faded blue breadbox, hopefully, but he smiled and shook his head.

"Who did you say you are, now, dear?"


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Ted: Left Turn at .....

Why do I gotta do the 'hunted' routine again?

I wind up the hero and the maroon winds up looking like, well, a maroon.

I always get into this bit by not turning left. This time I'm gonna do it!

"Dateline Albuquerque:

A vewy warge bunny wabbit was found dead today at the edge of town. He appawentwy had been tunnewing at a high wate of speed and wound up bonking his widdle head against the foundation of the ACME factowy. Details as they emerge. Back to the news desk with Porky."

"Th..th.. thanks for that re-re-re-re-report. That's all folks."

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From the Comments: Jeff R.

Speakingthrough for holdingclasp minestory youward, yesno?

Onsetwise, thencraft forsakenleft, dustclad, keylocked withinward exhibitdisplay backrooms. Valueknowledge nooneward injusticemade, so stealtaken meward.

Methinkings Onsetwise: thencraft wherewhensetting simpletask. Methinkins nowwise maxiful otherso. Beseeings of thunderbeast longneck, scalefliers, featherfliers, spouttopped swimtitans. Bewatchings of cutfightings, boomfightings, flashfightings, flyfightings. Behearings of truthpreaching godprophets. Betakings of valuethings; inkbrushings, stonechippings, metalmeltings.

Nowwise bewishings of meward homenow, but thencraft vigorstore emptyhurt. Beneedings of lightningchain or atomrock. Thesehaving youward, yesno? Betakings meward. Handholding meward wartool of flashfighting. Youhavings meward, or youlivings unward.

Youtruth meward: reasoncause slumberneed meward? Poisonsoup witchbrewings youfrom, yesno? Beseekings of thencraft youward? Neverno. Flashtool holemakings youward nowwise.

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