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July 26, 2007

David: The Spoils

“Is it done?”

“Yes, sir. The modifications have been completed to your specifications. Sir, I am compelled to ask again if you are absolutely certain about this.”

“Hey, I saved this whole freakin’ planet. I drove off the aliens single-handedly. The grateful populace offered me any reward I wanted. Did I take the Mona Lisa?”

“No, sir.”

“Did I have my face carved onto the Sphinx?”

“No, sir.”

“That’s right. I think I showed remarkable restraint, considering.”

It was pandemonium at the gallery when they revealed Rodan’s “The Thinker” re-sculpted with Jimmy the Needle’s face and a 12-inch erect phallus.

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