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April 3, 2007

Ted: A Very Personal Problem

"Let me make sure I understand. You mean that you have developed a psychological aversion to modern artifacts?"

"No. I mean that THINGS won't work around me. I woke up to the alarm, but when I hit snooze, it froze. I turned the faucet in the shower and it broke in my hand. My car didn't start, my phone died, my watch stopped, and I my contacts dissolved. I'm lucky I had silk clothing: my polyester evaporated."

"My office clock is still working."

"Watch this."

"I see. I can help, but you have appease Nujak, the god of fabrication first."

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