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October 25, 2005

Volume 7, Issue 25

Describe a weapon more mediocre than we could ever imagine.

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D: Love Grenade

Haldane held the pin between his fingers and tugged at it slightly, he felt it slide partway out and was tempted to pull it all the way.

"No!" cried Jezebelle taking one step closer to Haldane and stopping, "don't do it! Don't pull the pin!"

Haldane saw the pity in her eyes, remembered the feel of her touch and the sight of her with another man. He couldn't go on like this. She had to pay for the humiliation she’d caused.

With a firm tug he pulled the pin from the pin cushion and let her feel his little prick.

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Ted: The New Front

Abner knew he had the new weapon for a new era. The army of the twentieth century was run almost entirely by clerks. Paper pushers and bean counters. Abner's inverntion could spell ruin to the war effort if it fell into the wrong hands.

He packed up his old farm truck and headed to Washington. He drove carefully, taking the old wooden bridge with fear in his heart.

He was awarded a huge contract the next day. The Paper-Cut Generator, decimated the enemy. The atrocities were seen by only a few. Abner vowed to never agian invent anything so horrific.

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