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December 3, 2007

Ted: Eighth Day

The Petitioner braved through to the Throne.

"Lord God Jehovah, I come to judge you. You stand accused of instigating a five thousand year reign of terror marked by racism, sexism, homophobia, murder, rape, pillage, plunder, violation of basic human rights You instigated, commingling of funds, and money laundering."

"You studied scripture from age two until you died at eighty-three. You were the premiere scholar, consulted by popes and mullahs, rabbis and pagans. No man in history has known more about religion than you.

Of course I plead guilty.

I hope you do a better job, because I am retiring."

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