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July 12, 2005

From the Comments: The Mighty Emu

Gene splicing doesn’t have to be invitro. With a little pain and money you can splice a few chromosomes into your matrix and reap the rewards. Throw in mental programming and a conditioning routine and you can shape yourself anyway you please. No more obesity, shyness, or bad breath.

It’s the other side effects they don’t tell you about that are tough to live with. Look at me, I’m trim, fit, and I’m no longer a wallflower. But everything tastes like cardboard and I can’t remember my violin lessons.

Can’t make an omlette without breaking a few eggs, I suppose.

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